John

there's something so poetic
about the candle
never moved, never opened
fire never playfully teasing the wick
the smell of apple cinnamon
never fills the room
never performing the expected task

only touched three times a day
so as to hold a tube in place
as liquid drains
in a slow steady pace
leftovers of some
unsatisfying nourishment
for one who cannot taste or smell

other tools may think it useless
but its consistence is vital
it, being there, near the sink
helps the helpless
live.

The Parable of the cold can o' chili

Once upon a time, I was over at my friend's apartment, just chillin'. We'll call this friend Ben D. to protect his identity. Or... how about B. Downard. I like that better. No, how about just Ben. Ben is pretty chill.

Anyway.

Ben had been eating some chips and chili, as he chilled on his chillin' couch in his chillin' pad. After a while, he mentioned how the chili had gone cold.

"How about you warm it up again?" -Diane
"Nah." -Ben
"It's not that hard: just bring it over to the microwave and heat it up real quick." -Diane
"Nah. I'll just eat it cold." -Ben
"Do you like it cold?" -Diane
"No. But it's like this, ya see? Someday, at the end of the world, when all the microwaves fail to work and all we're left with is cans of cold chili, everyone will despair, except for me. I've been having cold chili all along, just to get ready. They'll all be crying for warm chili, and I'll just pop open a can, and spoon it in like I always do. I'll be prepared." -Ben

I've never met anybody who willingly endures unpleasant things just because they'd rather be prepared for the future.

Maybe there's nothing to analyze, and he really just didn't want to get off of the couch.

But I've thought a lot about this in my mission prep. I've still got a month and a half left, and I know I'll have quite a different lifestyle in the MTC and on the mission field then I do right now. So the question is, do I take the "Can of cold chili" approach? or the "Fill the canteen with all the warm chili you can, and just drink it down, enjoying every last warm bean, baby" approach?

I'm kind of doing a little bit of both.

• Missionary schedule (rise at 6:30 am, bed at 10:30 pm): Canteen. I tried this for a while, but let's face it. I'm totally a night person, and this is totally unreasonable until I'm in a place where everyone else is on the same schedule. It'll be probably a bit hard to get used to, but I'm not really doing anything to get ready for it now.
• Wearing missionary style clothes: cold chili (just about every Sunday, or chance to wear Sunday clothes. Not every day yet... don't worry)

Hana went to the MTC today, P.S. !!!

• but Nylons? : Canteen. I'm not putting those guys on, until forced. And after enduring it at the MTC, I hear I won't have to wear them out in the field because Honduras is so very hot! Yeah, man!
• Preach My Gospel/ Spanish Book of Mormon: cold chili. I try to do an hour a day, so that adjustment won't be as hard. I decided that the 2-verse-per-night-just-before-hopping-in-bed thing needed to be upgraded. How will I be able to teach if I haven't studied these things?
• Don't date: enjoy the nunnery life: canteen. I can't help it. I just really like doing things with my friend Paul... a lot. If you knew him, you'd understand. You'd be wanting to get into his schedule too. But I only have a month and a half, so just wait a bit before chasing him, all right? Thanks. :)

• Eat a lot of hispanic/Honduran food, and don't refuse: cold chili. I'm suffering and enduring this as best as I can, let me tell you! I tried tongue taco, freshly squeezed lime juice, friend bananas, and a Honduran dish called "Baleadas": tortilla+beans+eggs+cheese+sour cream= Amazing! The nice Honduran family which fed this to me said it was very typical down there. That's fine with me!

• Only church music and enertainment: canteen. Although, I've increased my Spanish music library considerably over the past couple of months. But... it'll have to be left behind. I imagine they wouldn't let me blast Juanes or Reik in the halls of the MTC.
• Speaking Spanish: cold chili. I've been so happy and blessed to be able to speak a lot lately. Pretty sure getting an Insta-friend from Bolivia just a few months before going on a Spanish speaking mission was no mistake. I love speaking in Spanish! Arianna is a great teacher! Also, I'd like to be on the fast track at the MTC if I could, so I'm trying to get ready for that dreaded phone call I hear I'll be getting one of these days. Oh! And the Spanish Branch on Sundays! What fun! I love it.

• 

• Temple: Canteen. There isn't a temple yet in Honduras, so I'm trying to go as much as I can now, with the blessing of having 13 temples in Utah. Besides, with such a lofty goal, I have lots to do!

I think it's interesting to see what I'm choosing... the things I'm already willing to sacrifice, and the things I'm holding on to until the very last second. When it's the end of the world and everyone is weeping for sleeping in, boys, movies, and days before nylons, hopefully I'll take my can of cold chili with a smile on my face and dig right in. Besides, I'll have some nice Horchata to wash it down with.

Miriam

I see her in their faces
though lacking lines from years still to come
framed in heavy hair
not as white or wispy soft
Mother's movements look so familiar
the way she softly taps the table with her hands
just as she had done
just like Miriam

As they retell her stories re-retold,
passing them from mouth to mouth, reverently
as one should handle one of her precious quilts
I see her in them

The stories form bit by bit
pulled from each memory
sometimes interjection
correction
on the particular wording
she may have used
even so,
the morbidity
of Big Clause and Little Clause
or the shocking lack of mentality
of dear lil' Epaminondas
is clearly communicated

there's laughter at the accuracy
then tears at her memory

I cannot yet recite her words as they
and my youthfulness does not reveal much resemblance
but I see her
in that ancient skirt
its unusual style for these times
but my favorite to wear

I see her
in my desire and attempt
to sew patches of random old projects
into something to keep someone
warm and comfortable
much time is spent
and every stitch says "I love you"
I'm beginning to understand her

She called me "friend"
and I become my own
friend
as I begin to see her in me

I'm the luckiest girl in all the world

If I were only able to be allowed to be thankful for two things in this whole world, they may very well be:

This is my family.
I can be with them forever.


You might want to click on the picture. It'll show you in detail how beautiful and attractive they are. But then, that's a requirement to be a Francis (or a Lund in this case).

A tribute

to a great fictional character
and a fan-freakin'-tastic muggle.


I saw Harry Potter on Saturday, and thought they did a really good job with it. It's amazing how those books and movies can pull you in, until invisibility cloaks and sorting hats feel like the norm.

Yesterday I saw nazzju, and she informed me that I'm going on a mission at the most perfect of times. You see, the 6th movie came out shortly before I'm going, the 7th movie will come out a few months before I get home, and the last movie will be out a month or two after I get home. So as far as Harry Potter is concerned, it couldn't be more perfect! And as far as I'm concerned... same thing. :)

I'm loving her and her shirt too. "The Guitar is a Horcrux". :D

♫♪ "I want to be a missionary now...

... I don't want to wait til Sep-tem-ber...." ♫♪


I'm sure there are good reasons for me having to wait to enter the MTC for another 52 days, but sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy!! I know the mission will be tough, I know my Spanish isn't even close to good enough for me to survive on my own out there, I know I have more preparing to do. But I won't be alone. I have faith that if I am willing, the Lord can use me to be His instrument and convey the message of His good news, despite my many shortcomings. It's amazing how anxious I feel to go where I've been called to go: to be anxiously engaged in the best cause.


I have a testimony of the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon. Through diligent study, we can find many lessons which are applicable to us. It speaks of our Savior, Jesus Christ, who loves me and you so much, that He chose to take our sins, weaknesses, pains and experiences upon Himself, suffering and dying so that we can live eternally. Our Heavenly Father manifests His love in everything we have, even our own breath, and especially in the act of sending His Son to fulfill the atonement. God knows each and every one of us by name. He knows our fears, problems, worries, joys, ponderings, and our hearts. Knowing these things brings me joy.

Everyone deserves to know these things too, don't you think?

PS: Speaking of missions... check it out.

"Honeydew you wanna get married?" "Sure, but I cantaloupe."

The cantaloupe was really tasty this morning. And then I looked over at the counter and saw this.
"They were three for a dollar! I couldn't help it!!" -mom